17 May 1859
During the six years following Clemens' departure from Hannibal, his publications were limited to several out-of-town “travel” letters written for Orion's newspapers in Hannibal and Muscatine (Iowa) and three Thomas Jefferson Snodgrass letters in the Keokuk Post.1 The two-year period Clemens devoted to learning the river proved especially barren in writings. But less than six weeks after he became a licensed pilot on 9 April 1859, Clemens published “River Intelligence” in the New Orleans Crescent. This satire on Isaiah Sellers was perhaps the most ambitious of his prewestern imaginative pieces. It was his first extended prose burlesque, a mode he freely experimented with in later sketches and in travel writings and novels. Furthermore, Clemens' Sergeant Fathom anticipated a host of loquacious eccentrics he created in years to come—men who revealed their idiosyncrasies through a seemingly unrestrained flow of words.
Isaiah Sellers, the original of Sergeant Fathom, was a pilot and captain on the Mississippi River for almost forty years: he began his career in 1825, when he was twenty-two or twenty-three years old, and he died on 6 March 1864. Although he was known as an unusually safe pilot, he nevertheless for many years held the record for the speediest run between New Orleans and St. Louis. His unequaled experience qualified him as an authority on the river—its history, commerce, landmarks, and hydrodynamics—and as Clemens recalled, he used to contribute “brief paragraphs of plain practical information about the river” to the New Orleans newspapers.2 While writing Life on the Mississippi in 1882, Clemens said of Sellers that “out there he was ‘illustrious.’ ”3 And both in that book and in his autobiography (1906) [begin page 127] Clemens recalled the jealousy of his fellow pilots toward Sellers, whose experiences easily overshadowed their own, making “their small marvels look pale and sick.”4
But there may have been more personal reasons for the animosity that fueled Clemens' lampoon of Sellers, just as three years later his hostile feelings toward Judge G. T. Sewall lay behind the hoax “Petrified Man” (no. 28). A recently discovered account of Sellers' career, written in 1880 (three years before Life on the Mississippi was published), relates an occurrence that specifically connects Sellers with Clemens:
Sellers was a tall, fine looking person, as straight as an Indian, and carried a distingué air. He was a man to attract attention anywhere, and he also had his peculiarities and mannerisms. One of the latter was a passion to sleep, and that oft-times a little beyond the middle watch when the other pilot of the boat was compelled to do more than his share of duty because of Sellers' somnolent appetite. Mark Twain, in those days an apprentice or cub pilot on the same boat, and the opposite watch to Sellers', used to be sent on repeated errands to arouse the heavy sleeper. On one occasion 'tis said Twain was suddenly struck square on the nose by a heavy boot, and he didn't like it much.5
The anonymous writer (who knew some details of Henry Clemens' death in Memphis and so may be reliable) then mentions that “some time later” Clemens retaliated by publishing a lampoon of Sellers in the New Orleans Crescent. If the described incident actually occurred, Clemens' resentment of Sellers probably struck deep and continued to rankle. In line with this supposition, Allan Bates has presented evidence showing that the remorse Clemens expressed in chapter 50 of Life on the Mississippi about the cruelty of his satire “was only a pretense, or at least was not permanent.”6
It is possible that Clemens served on the William M. Morrison in July 1858, when Sellers was pilot of that boat.7 After the death of his brother Henry on June 21, Clemens was temporarily without a berth because of the destruction of the Pennsylvania, and so may have signed on the Morrison as a clerk. On July 2, the day the Morrison left St. Louis on its regular run to New Orleans, the Missouri Republican listed a “Clemens” as third clerk along with the regular clerks, Moore and Garbutt.8 Two weeks later, when [begin page 128] the Morrison returned to St. Louis, “Walsh” had replaced “Clemens” as third clerk.9
Clemens' Crescent burlesque was obviously written for his fellow pilots, who must have been familiar with Sellers' contributions of “river intelligence” to the newspapers, and who may have been directly responsible for having the burlesque published.10 Judging from the date of Sergeant Fathom's letter (“May 8, 1859”), the immediate occasion for Clemens' burlesque was a letter from Sellers, accompanied by an editorial preface, which was published on May 7 in the “Steamboat and River Intelligence” column of the New Orleans True Delta:
Our friend, Capt. Sellers, one of the oldest pilots on the river, and now on the Wm. M. Morrison, sends us a rather bad account concerning the state of the river. Capt. Sellers is a man of experience, and though we do not coincide in his view of the matter, we give his note a place in our columns, only hoping that his prophecy will not be verified in this instance:
A curly brace appears to the right of the two lines below.Steamer Wm. M. Morrison.
Vicksburg, May 4, 1859.
The river from your city up to this port is higher than it has been since the high water of 1815, and my opinion is that the water will be in Canal street before the 1st day of June. Mrs. Turner's plantation, which has not been affected by the river since 1815, is now under water.
Yours, &c.,
Isaiah Sellers.11
Clemens recalled in Life on the Mississippi that Sellers' letter “became the text” for his burlesque, in which he strung his “fantastics out to the extent of eight hundred or a thousand words.”12 His memory was quite accurate: the burlesque is closely modeled on the preface and the letter, parodying their language as well as their content. Clemens introduced “Our [begin page 129] friend Sergeant Fathom,” who sent a “bad account concerning the state of the river,” at even greater length than the True Delta had done, and he greatly elaborated his accomplishments, charm, and fame in order to mock them. His preface was in turn followed by a parody of Sellers' letter, written from the “R. R. Steamer Trombone,” and featuring a grand disquisition on “high water.”
Both Sellers' original letter and the parody reflect real conditions on the river. Late in April, high winds, heavy rains, and a strong tide at New Orleans had combined to flood the upper and lower steamboat landings; water surging over the levee had turned streets into rivers. The river opposite Vicksburg was reported in the True Delta “as being twenty inches and a half above the highest water of last year, and eighteen and a quarter above the water of 1850. The water of 1828 was the highest ever known in Vicksburg until this year—the river now being sixteen inches above that.”13 By the first week of May the ominous rise at Vicksburg had reached New Orleans, and the river, swelled by continuing rains, was flooding the city streets more seriously than before.14 Sergeant Fathom's comparison of this situation with the real “ ‘high-water’ years” and his prediction that the river would soon “cease to rise altogether” should be read in this context.
But Clemens' parody also drew upon still another communication from Sellers to the True Delta: extracts from his journal published six weeks earlier on 22 March 1859 in the same column, “Steamboat and River Intelligence.” The following extracts illustrate the distinctive combination of pedestrian observation, antiquarian memory, and far-fetched speculation that characterized Sellers' writings, and that made him a good target for ridicule:
While the upper river was at this low stage, the towboats Post Boy and Grampus towed to sea the packet ship Oceana, drawing 21 feet; a fact confirming the theory that low waters above tend to increase the depth of channels at the mouths of the Mississippi.
Further confirmation is found in the condition of the river during the years 1839 and '40, the average of which was very low, so much so that the lakes and ponds in the vicinity of Bolivar, Miss., and Helena, Arkansas, dried up and all the fish died. . . .
After 34 years of careful and constant observation, I am clearly of opinion that the changes so frequently occurring in the channel of this river, at certain points, are solely the result of the action of currents at extreme stages of high and low water on the banks and bed of the river. I notice that where the river is narrow, and the current strikes the bluff at right angles, there is invariably a shoal place immediately above. . . .
[begin page 130]The river in 1858 was 18 inches higher at Island 18, 70 and 71 than it has been since 1815. This is on record. During the latter year, the water was checked by the bluff above Walnut hills and backed up some fifty miles. . . . In 1828, 1844 and 1851, the river was backed up from the same point, varying from 30 to 50 miles.15
By combining elements from Sellers' original letter and from this journal, Clemens mocked the captain's public image as “one of the oldest pilots on the river” and a “man of experience.”
Moreover, Sellers apparently talked the way he wrote, a fact suggested by the report of “C. C.,” writing from Cairo “On Board Steamer Wm. M. Morrison, June 16, 1858,” a time of extremely high water: “I have just learned from Capt. Sellers, who was piloting in '28, that the average width of the river from Cairo to Vicksburg now, is 300 feet more than it was at that time; and from Cairo to Memphis there remains scarcely a land-mark, standing at that period; and this fact reduces the decision as to the comparative height of the river then and now to something of an uncertainty.”16 Even without his personal and professional animus, Clemens would always find such characters ripe for satire.17
Our friend Sergeant Fathom, one of the oldest cub pilots on the river, and now on the Railroad LineⒺexplanatory note steamer TromboneⒺexplanatory note, sends us a rather bad account concerning the state of the river. Sergeant Fathom is a “cub” of much experience, and although we are loth to coincide in his view of the matter, we give his note a place in our columns, only hoping that his prophesyⒶtextual note will not be verified in this instance. While introducing the Sergeant, “we consider it but simple justice (we quote from a friend of his) to remark that he is distinguished for being, in pilot phrase, ‘close,’Ⓔexplanatory note as well as superhumanly ‘safe.’ “It is a well-known fact that he has made fourteen hundred and fifty trips in the New Orleans and St. Louis trade without causing serious damage to a steamboat. This astonishing success is attributed to the fact that he seldom runs his boat after early candle light. It is related of the Sergeant that upon one occasion he actually ran the chute of Glasscock's IslandⒺexplanatory note, down stream, in the night, and at a time, too, when the river was scarcely more than bank fullⒺexplanatory note. His method of accomplishing this feat proves what we have just said of his “safeness”—he sounded the chute first, and then built a fire on the head of the island to run by. As to the Sergeant's “closeness,” we have heard it whispered that he once went up to the right of the “Old Hen,” but this is probably a pardonable little exaggeration, prompted by the love and admiration in which he is held by various ancient dames of his acquaintance, (for albeit the Sergeant may have already numbered the allotted years of man, still his form is erect, his step is firm, his hair retains its sable hue, and more [begin page 132] than all, he hath a winning way about him, an air of docility and sweetness, if you will, and a smoothness of speech, together with an exhaustless fund of funny sayings; and lastly, an ever-flowing stream, without beginning, or middle, or end, of astonishing reminiscences of the ancient Mississippi, which, taken together, form a tout ensemble which is a sufficient excuse for the tender epithet which is, by common consent, applied to him by all those ancient dames aforesaid of “che-arming creature!”)ⒶemendationAs the Sergeant has been longer on the river, and is better acquainted with it than any other “cub” extant, his remarks are entitled to extraordinary consideration, and are always read with the deepest interest by high and low, rich and poor, from “Kiho”Ⓔexplanatory note to KamschatkaⒺexplanatory note, for be it known that his fame extends to the uttermost parts of the earth:
R. R. Steamer Trombone,
Vicksburg, May 8, 1859.}
TheⒶemendation river from New Orleans up to Natchez is higher than it has been since the niggers were executed, (which was in the fall of 1813Ⓔexplanatory note) and my opinion is, that if the rise continues at this rate the water will be on the roof of the St. Charles HotelⒺexplanatory note before the middle of January. The point at Cairo, which has not even been moistened by the river since 1813, is now entirely under water.
However, Mr. Editor, the inhabitants of the Mississippi Valley should not act precipitately and sell their plantations at a sacrifice on account of this prophesy of mine, for I shall proceed to convince them of a great fact in regard to this matter, viz: That the tendency of the Mississippi is to rise less and less higher every year (with an occasional variation of the rule), that such has been the case for many centuries, and finally that it will cease to rise at all. Therefore, I would suggestⒶemendation to the planters, as we say in an innocent little parlor game, commonly called “draw,” that if they can only “stand the raise” this time, they may enjoy the comfortable assurance that the old river's banks will never hold a “full” again during their natural lives.
In the summer of 1763 I came down the river on the old first “Jubilee.”Ⓔexplanatory note She was new, then, however; a singular sort of a single-engine boat, with a Chinese captain and a Choctaw crew, forecastle on her stern, wheels in the center, and the jackstaffⒺexplanatory note “no where,” for I steered her with a window shutter, and when we wanted to land we sent a line ashore and “rounded her to” with a yoke of oxen.
Well, sir, we wooded off the top of the big bluff above SelmaⒺexplanatory note—the only dry land visible—and waited there three weeks, swapping knives and playing “seven up”Ⓔexplanatory note with the Indians, waiting for the river to fall. Finally, it fell about a hundred feet, and we went on. One day we [begin page 133] rounded to, and I got in a horse-trough, which my partner borrowed from the Indians up there at Selma while they were at prayers, and went down to sound around No. 8, and while I was gone my partner got aground on the hills at Hickman. After three days labor we finally succeeded in sparring her off with a capstan bar, and went on to Memphis. By the time we got there the river had subsided to such an extent that we were able to land where the Gayoso HouseⒺexplanatory note now stands. We finished loading at Memphis, and engaged part of the stone for the present St. Louis Court-House, (which was then in process of erection) to be taken up on our return trip.
You can form some conception by these memoranda of how high the water was in 1763. In 1775 it did not rise so high by thirty feet; in 1790 it missed the original mark at least sixty-five feet; in 1797, one hundred and fifty feet; and in 1806, nearly two hundred and fifty feet. These were “high-water” years. The “high waters” since then have been so insignificant that I have scarcely taken the trouble to notice them. Thus, you will perceive that the planters need not feel uneasy. The river may make an occasional spasmodic effort at a flood, but the time is approaching when it will cease to rise altogether.
In conclusion, sir, I will condescend to hint at the foundation of these arguments: When me and DeSoto discovered the Mississippi, I could stand at Bolivar Landing (several miles above “Roaring Waters Bar”) and pitch a biscuit to the main shore on the other side, and in low water we waded across at DonaldsonvilleⒺexplanatory note. The gradual widening and deepening of the river is the whole secret of the matter.
Yours, etc.,
Sergeant Fathom.
The first printing appeared without title in the regular column “River Intelligence” in the New Orleans Crescent for 17 May 1859 (p. 7), which is copy-text. Copies: clipping in MTP; PH from the Louisiana State University Library, Baton Rouge. It seems unlikely that Clemens supervised the printing in any way, because he was serving on the steamer A. T. Lacey under Bart Bowen at this time, and the Lacey was scheduled to leave New Orleans on May 14 (“River Intelligence,” New Orleans Crescent, 11 May 1859, p. 7).